Saturday 20 February 2010

How TO Get Out Of Saturday Shopping- Lesson 1.


Hello, My Lovelies,

As normal I am wishing you all well and hoping you are all okay.

I was doing well today. It started so lovely. I actually got to wake up next to Francis this morning and had a snuggle...just a snuggle..stop it with the muck minds you!!!!!
Now waking up next to your beloved is normal for most people , but since Francis went back to work this is not our normal way to wake up.
I swear the man is part cat burglar the way he can sneak out in the mornings undetected.
Francis says that if I actually went to sleep before 2am, that I would wake up, but as he leaves by 5:30 to 6am every morning I am too unconscious to notice...there he goes with that being right again!!!

And; of course I haven't been sleeping well for a little while, but it comes and goes....the insomnia
and I have learnt to live with it by reading or drawing or designing.
I use to get up to all sorts in the wee-hours of the night, cleaning, dancing, exercising, paperwork, decorating, baking, bread making and re-arranging the rooms was a big favourite of mine. The kids didn't know for years what they would get up to in the morning. I even use to re-arrange their rooms with them in their beds, then tell them the fairies had done it. That was until one of my brothers, a child psychologist said that it could actually cause them upset and uncertainty and make them feel insecure at night. Years later when they had worked it out and we talked about it one day they all said they had liked it and felt special, as none of their friends had fairies visit them to re-arrange their rooms.
I use to do the same with decorating the house at Christmas, when the kids got up it would all be done. They thought it was Santa and the elves.

Any way I don't do much at nights now as Francis has night terrors and finds it a comfort to him when I go to bed when he does and as a result he has less of them, so he actually sleeps well because I'm there....oh the irony!!!

We thought we'd do the weekly food shop...I hate doing on Saturday and would rather go Sundays...in fact I hate having to go out of the house on Saturday..I think it's a Jewish thing, with me as we always stayed at home on Saturdays as a family. So Saturday has always been my Sunday and Sundays are for family time...mind you I feel almost the same way as Sundays as I do Saturdays...but I rather go out on a Sunday.

It's one of those mad things that happen when you are raised in a religion that is from one culture, while being raised in a country with a different culture.
For instance, all the women of my family are modest dressers, including the young women and girls. Patricia is a very modest dresser, up to date with fashion, but modest. This was never taught to her, it's what she saw and is normal to her. As a result all her friends wear less than her and show more of themselves and think she is a little odd for being so modest and tell her to show a bit more. To which she says, she is not comfortable with this and that less is not always more.

Here I am waffling again...... how do you all put up with me?

Day was going well, wasn't too happy about food shopping on Saturday but oh well such is life.
Bear (the out door cat) arrived for one of his many meals and in the process of taking a tin of cat food of of the tower that is our Callum, we dropped the tin ( I say we as neither of us were really to blame) straight down onto my foot, hitting my second and middle toe.

No SATURDAY in sane shopping for me......RESULT!!!!

Mind you, I must give you a word of warning here.
Being hit on the foot with a tin can is not to be done lightly......it hurts....it really hurts,
it hurts so much that I actually cried like a little kid, for about 10mins.
I couldn't stop crying, it is so darn painful.
The toe next to my big toe is almost the same size as the big one, walking is getting better, but I had to hop for a while and have had my foot up nearly all day.

In case actually doing this is a tat too much for you, I have come up with a cheats way to this:-

Using the green and blue shades of your eye make-up palette and throwing in a little purple and dark grey.
Use only matt shade, no sparkly shades, no bruise glitters!!!
Apply make up to area and work away like an old Master until convincing nasty bruise is obtained.
Next hop up and down cursing....you have to throw these in.
Cry on cue, if you need help chop an onion to make it look like you had a reason to be in your own kitchen.
Try not to speak, but rather making moaning high pitched noises, point at tin then your foot.
Do not let any one one get too close to foot, make lots of noises to put them off touching.
Come up with a well practised limp as you hobble away to sit down, after all that work you will need to sit down.
IMPORTANT NOTE:- remember to place can on floor. Vital evidence.
Demand ice pack wrapped in a towel and place on foot, this will hide your handy work and keep it away from preying eyes.

Result.. you get to put your feet up and be pampered all day

Right now all I need to do is get out of Sunday shopping and I am on a roll.

Much love
Lia
xx

6 comments:

  1. What a nasty accident! I hope the damaged toes recover quickly. Baby yourself in the meantime.

    I hope you have someone to cook for you. Take Care!

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  2. I'm confused, but if I read this right, you made up the accident to get out of going to the store? You sly fox you;o) I am an odd duck in that I like to go to the grocery store!

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  3. I'm with you here shopping on Satuday is just evil. If I have to do it then I'd rather be out and back before 8am. I can't stand the aimless milling about that Saturday seems to bring.
    Hope your tootsies get better just as soon as the shopping need passes!
    x

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  4. I am literally laughing out loud Lia. You are so funny! Thanks for the tips, haha! I am so going to try this out :) I love your posts so much I could just scream.
    Big hugs!!!

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  5. You are one funny gal...and I love you for it!!

    Normally, I cringe when I see long blog posts. I just don't have the time for them and I hate that because I'd like to read them all.

    And then there are your blog posts. I never, ever skip over one no matter how short or long it may be.

    I imagine your English accent as I read your words and that makes me like whatever you write even more.

    Thanks a bunch and look out for your toes!

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  6. I have decided it is horrible we live in 2 different countries, we have so much in common..I can stay up until 2am as well, think all the recipes we could cook up at midnight..lol I do hope one day we can meet, I love hearing all your stories...

    ReplyDelete

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