The Mad Rambling of a Hot Hormonal Forty Something.
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Monday, 8 March 2010
Fairy Cake Volunteer Troops.
I hope you all had a good weekend. We were so lazy and did nothing. How terrible is that? When I say nothing I do mean nothing. We did a little shopping, a little cooking and a lot of time wasting. I think the most productive thing I did all weekend was to make cakes, box them up and give a box each to the 2 sons and Francis.
Now, I am aware that this sounds very odd, however there is method in my madness. You see I am struggling with this whole weight loss malarkey. For 4 weeks now my weight has not moved, well that's if you don't count the 3lb I put on and then took off again. I have no idea how that happened. To say that I am a little fed up would be like saying that the Amazon River is just a little stream. I won't give up, but I am annoyed. I tried changing my portions, but how do you cut down on the amount of fruit and veg that you MUST eat in order to get your illness under control, so that you can lose the weight and go and exercise, as the doctor says you have to be a certain weight in order to do that.
I feel screwed. Really, really screwed. The good news is that the weather is getting better and on Friday I picked up "E" from the airport. Over 10 days later due to air traffic control in France and it being the first flight they could put her on without it costing us more money. Anyway she is back now, which means we will be spending lots of time together and I will get us out for walks. So that might help the weight nonsense.
Anyway back to those cakes. I make great fairy cakes, or cupcakes as some call them and I actually miss making them right now as it would be too tempting. Or so I thought, that was till Francis remained me of the fact that when I actually make cakes and biscuits I very rarely eat them on the day as I am for some reason put off by them. It's normally the next day or day after that I start to nibble on them. So Francis suggested that I make fewer of them than normal and that the boys would gobble them up. But I never see the point in getting everything out and putting the oven on for 12 cakes. Seems a waste of time and energy to me.
So I made loads of little fairy cakes, I made plain ones, vanilla ones, fruit ones, chocolate ones, lemon ones, and orange ones. I then decorated them with butter icing and swirls of chocolate, sprinkles and all sorts really. Stood back admired my handy work, then immediately panicked What was I thinking? Is this diet suicide or what? What do you do with 50 fairy cakes??????
I could feel the will power slipping away and called the boys to rescue me. They being the wonderful young men that they are and each of them a self sacrificing cake warrior that they are, immediately threw themselves head first into the battle. There was cup cake paper flying everywhere, the kitchen was awash with sprinkles, butter cream icing, and the noise of men in the full throws of a battle that they must win at all costs.
One by one my wonderful troops began to fall, shot down by chocolate cream and frosting. Overcome by the sugar feast that was slowly beginning to defeat them, they decide to re-group and pull back. Oh no what was a girl to do?. We decided to form a battle plan. We discussed calling in more troops, but my boys insisted that they could beat the demoed fairy cakes. Once they had fully recovered from the first wave.
In the meantime I decided to sneak up on the cakes and take them all prisoner. Sneaking under enemy lines I quickly overcame them and managed to take them all down and got the boxed into 3 boxes of equal amounts of cake. They begged and pleaded with me not to put the lids on, they even told me that they didn't contain that many calories, that they could by pass my hips and that they wouldn't make me ill, even though they have ingredients that do make me ill. But I was ruthless and jammed the lids on tightly.
3 boxes, 3 men, genius, so I re-gathered my troops and gave them the responsibility of their prisoners and asked them to remember to treat them humanly. You see now that the boys have control of the cakes it is beyond my control.
So you see there was method in my madness of boxing them up and then giving them away to the boys as a gift. Stops me from eating them.